How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
