You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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