i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
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