she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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