I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
