the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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