whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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