i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
