so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
