Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
