Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
