Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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