Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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