i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
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