she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
