I'm drive I can fine osifer
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
