one two three fourrrrnication!
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
