I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
