he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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