Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
