did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
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