Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
