It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Someone came in the potted fern
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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