I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
