drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
