well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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