No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
