just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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