I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
