So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
