You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
