I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
