She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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