SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
they're like a gay fantastic four
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
