well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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