According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
