Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Semen is not good for contacts.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
