Define "chronic" masturbator.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
