You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Is Oprah even human
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
