he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
