I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
