i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
