I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
