I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
