he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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