i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
