Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
