i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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