ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
