I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
